Thursday, December 15, 2011

Decisions, Doctors and Details

   It has been way too long since I have been on here and posted what has been happening in our world, so I'm not even really sure where to start. Life, needless to say, is pretty crazy right now with the Holidays and has been pretty unpredictable lately which makes it very interesting too.

   Judah has been adjusting much better to school and is doing great according to his teachers. He still has the daily meltdown when I drop him off and struggles with the separation anxieties quite a bit, but seems to be fine once they can get him up the stairs and in the class room. The one thing I have heard from his teachers and the others at the school is that he always has a huge smile on his face and is so happy. That, of course, makes me happy and I am so grateful for the amazing staff at Kiddie Garden that have been so great with him and helped him grow and learn so much over the past 3 years. Thinking of him graduating Pre-K in the spring and not being there anymore already brings tears to my eyes! Thankfully we still have several months before I have to cross that bridge :)

   He is also continuing Speech and Language therapy at one of our local elementary schools and is doing great with it. He seems to have some good weeks and some, well, not so good weeks. One week his teacher even had to make him "listening ears" to wear, but they didn't even seem to help. They became more of a toy than a tool :) One of the huge benefits of the therapy is that we have seem a huge decrease in the number of emotional meltdowns he was having and an increase in expressing his emotions through words. One of the funniest times was on Halloween night. Our family has a family owned and operated Lock and Security company and participate every year in a local event called "Boo in Boonville". We set up in front of our shop and pass out candy to the hoards of people that come by. It is a lot of fun and Judah has always helped pass out the candy to a small degree in past years. This year he announced that he wasn't going to be scared of the kids dressed up (which usually really upset him) and he was going to pass out the candy. He followed through and did great. We did make the mistake of telling him that certain candy (soft candy) was for the smaller kids and the hard candy was for the bigger kids and they could only have one piece. When the evening started he didn't want to give anyone any because they already had one piece in their bags! He took it literally that they could only have 1 piece :) Later and older child asked for a package of the soft candy and Judah looked him straight in the eyes and said "NO, you are too big for that. It's for the little kids" He also wanted to measure every kid against himself for size to determine if they are a "big kid" or a little kid". The best part, though, was when he abruptly got out of his chair and started walking inside for no apparent reason. We stopped him and asked if everything was ok and if anything had upset him. He quickly replied in a very matter of fact tone "Oh, I'm fine. I just need a rest right now. I'll be back in a minute". It was very impressive and adorable, to say the least!

   The one area that he seems to still have the most trouble with is church. Our church has a great children's ministry and staff and I am so grateful for the time and energy they invest in the kids to teach them the love of God and about the Bible! We usually begin every Sunday morning with "I don't want to go to Super Church! (the children's service)"It's not exactly the way I would prefer to start the day, but it is what it is. We did, however, come to a great compromise recently that has seemed to make for a happier day for everyone involved. We agreed that as long as he would go to Sunday School at the beginning of service he could them come in the sanctuary and sit with me during the rest of the service instead of going to "Super Church" which is a culmination of all things most children love and Asperger kids hate. It is loud and crowded with games, skits, music, etc. This compromise has seemed to work really well for the past few weeks and he has even gone into Sunday school willingly the past couple of weeks. Last week his very daring teacher, Ms. Heather, was even able to talk him into going into Super church for a few minutes before it was too overwhelming for him :) At this point I have realized one very important truth: I have to choose my battles wisely and some just aren't worth fighting (for me or him)!!

   On the doctor front, we are making some great strides and hopefully moving in the right direction for him. This fall we made the decision to switch family doctors and have since realized it was a great move for him. Our new doctor has a lot of experience with Asperger's children and has been great with him. We have also been able to change his insurance provider and get a referral to what seems to be a much better facility for treatment and therapies. The one we had been referred to before took over 3 months to just call us about filing out preliminary paperwork, let alone setting up an appointment for him. The new center called us within a matter of a couple weeks and are able to get him in before the end of the year!! It is also on the same campus as our doctors office and comes highly recommended by our doctor and the school corporation specialist. I feel very good that things are finally moving in the right direction for him now and we will be able to get him the resources he needs to best deal with his struggles.

   Finally, the last big thing going on is that we have come to a decision that I never really thought I would come to. Although, it seems so far off right now, we have been looking at Kindergarten options for him and trying to decide the best avenue to take. I had always said that I would never put my children in public school, not because I have anything against them personally, but because they tend to have much larger class sizes and I would prefer that my children be taught academics from a Christian World view. It is all just personal preference. Anywho, I had always said that I wanted to either put our kids in private school or home school them. However, as we began looking at our options we quickly realized that home school and private school weren't going to be able to offer the resources that Judah will need to succeed. It was a shocking revelation to me! As we looked at each option we realized that home schooling would just feed his desire to separate himself and not interact with peers. It just couldn't offer the much needed social skill building that is so important for him. Then as we looked at private schools we realized that while they do have the smaller class sizes, they don't offer the one on one aids, speech therapies, occupational therapies, etc. that our school corporation can offer him. So, a long struggle with the decision (on my part, not Larry's) we came to the conclusion that we will be enrolling him in Public School next fall. Thankfully, we have a great school system here and they have worked as hard to ease my fears as much as Judah's! They have done everything possible to make the transition for him as easy as possible and even offered to let us meet with the teachers before the school year begins to see who will fit best with Judah's needs, tour the school during the summer so it won't be as overwhelming for him in the fall, and anything else we may need to best help him. I am so thankful for all the support they have offered this far and am praying that I will adjust to these changes as well as Judah probably will :) lol

   So, all in all it has been a pretty good few months. We have made some great strides and Judah is constantly growing and changing. We still have bad days, but he seems to be handling them better. We have a very full and eventful Christmas holiday coming up in the next couple of weeks and it should be fun. Next Monday night Judah (and Hannah) will be participating their preschool Christmas program. Judah is going to actually be Santa in it and is even looking forward to it. We are just praying we can make it through all the parties and celebrations without too many overloads and meltdowns and are thankful for Angry Birds and Bunny Shooter on our phones which quickly provide a "quiet time" no matter where we are :)

   I hope you have a very blessed and happy Christmas and New Year. Hopefully it won't be as long before I post another update...